After a courtship filled with coincidences, and 11 years of marriage,
Fiona and Peter Sukhimov are
completely & utterly in love.

But when her Pete suddenly dies
Fiona is left to try to make sense of a world without meaning.
Until, at Peter's funeral,
a file is dropped into her lap.


  A file containing only
  three nonsensical phrases...

After a courtship filled with coincidences, and 11 years of marriage,
Fiona and Peter Sukhimov are completely & utterly in love.

But when her Pete suddenly dies
Fiona's left to try to make sense of a world without meaning.
Until, at Peter's funeral, a file is dropped into her lap.

  A file containing only three nonsensical phrases...








To decipher the cryptic contents
of her Peter file,
Fiona finds herself being helped
—mostly against her will—
by both sides of her family.

Peter's father, Arsen Sukhimov,
got his young children out of Ukraine to in Melbourne start a crane-rental business he named 'U-Crane'.

Alexa, Peter's younger sister, is sick and tired of being used as her father's naked business-bait in U-Crane's sauna.

And then there's Yuri,
Peter's unhinged brother;
who learnt English from watching
The King And I on VHS,
and who, because of a dream,
knows that his brother was murdered. 

To decipher the cryptic contents of her Peter file,
Fiona finds herself being helped
—mostly against her will—by both sides of her family.

Peter's father, Arsen Sukhimov, got his young children out of Ukraine to in Melbourne start a crane-rental business
he named 'U-Crane'.

Alexa, Peter's younger sister, is sick and tired of being used
as her father's naked business-bait in U-Crane's sauna.

And then there's Yuri, Peter's unhinged brother;
who learnt English from watching The King And I on VHS,
and who, because of a dream, knows that his brother was murdered. 








And as for Fiona's immediate family...

Her father, Geoff, longs to find someone with whom he can retire to Vietnam, but seems to only meet women with pea fetishes and sects addictions.

Annie, Fiona's daughter,
is increasingly drawn to the rebellious Ukrainian side of her family.  

While Fiona's brother, Mel,
accidentally smuggles gum into Singapore, then in Melbourne gets approached by a tracksuited Ukrainian—who tells him that his brother-in-law was better
at smuggling gun than he was.

— 'Wait, gun or gum?' —

And as for Fiona's immediate family...

Her father, Geoff, longs to find someone with whom he can retire to Vietnam, but seems to only meet women with pea fetishes
and sects addictions.

Annie, Fiona's daughter, is becoming increasingly drawn to
the rebellious Ukrainian side of her family.  

While Fiona's brother, Mel,
accidentally smuggles gum into Singapore
   then in Melbourne gets approached by a tracksuited Ukrainian—
who tells him that his brother-in-law 
  was better at smuggling gun than he was.

— 'Wait, gun or gum?' —


SO FIONA BEGINS
TO UNCOVER THE SUSPICIOUS BUT FATEFUL MEANING OF



SO FIONA BEGINS TO UNCOVER
THE SUSPICIOUS BUT FATEFUL MEANING OF


Containing a sauna-goblin,
an elephant-napping,

& an insecure animal medium;
TWO Georgian fencing parties,

an acrobatic shepherd, a tea serf,
Rain Woman, a vodka priest, a talking hat,  an arm dealer, an arm steeler, a sock-market crash, a hair saloon, a bonobo & a very good-looking horse;
a soil baron beetroot toothpaste,
and a gum smuggler—

The Peter File is the 1st EVER SITCOM-IN-PROSE

Containing a sauna-goblin,
an elephant-napping, & an insecure animal medium;
TWO Georgian fencing parties, an acrobatic shepherd,
a tea serf, Rain Woman, a vodka priest, a talking hat,
an arm dealer, an arm steeler, a sock-market crash, a hair saloon,
a bonobo & a very good-looking horse; a soil baron
beetroot toothpaste, & a gum smuggler—
The Peter File is the 1st EVER
SITCOM-IN-PROSE

And, a year after travelling
across Ukraine to research
half of its characters,

And,
a year after travelling across Ukraine
to research half of its characters,

the peter file joshua humphreys comedy novel

IS NOW AVAILABLE!

Directly from its author,
sent to anywhere in the world
(and 5% of its proceeds
  go to Ukrainian refugees.)

IS NOW AVAILABLE!

Directly from its author,
sent to anywhere in the world
(and 5% of its proceeds go to Ukrainian refugees.)

the peter file joshua humphreys comedy novel

Order The Peter File with my 1st & last books—and SAVE 25% on your
comedy novel book-haul.

$46
including shipping

USD24
including shipping
to anywhere in the world

USD24
including shipping

Order The Peter File with my 1st & my
last book—and SAVE 25% on your
comedy novel book-haul!

$46
including shipping

(prices convert to AUD at checkout)

Copyright © 2022
Joshua Humphreys.
All rights reserved, bitches. 



Copyright © 2022 Joshua Humphreys. 
All rights reserved, bitches.